Sex sermons stimulate conversation: Labor has to disagree

On Wednesday I attended the first of a three-week sermon given by Pastor Charlie Granade from Ridgeview Bible Church in Chadron. The series’ title is “Solomon on Sex” and follows the book of Solomon, explaining the beauty of sex within marriage.

While Granade had several good points, there were some times when I had to disagree with him.

Granade started out by reading the lyrics to a Jason Mraz song titled “Butterfly.”

One line is “Ask those hips if I can touch / Because they’re the perfect jumping off point of getting closer to your/ Butterfly.”
Granade added that “that’s not a butterfly, by the way.” Thanks for the enlightenment, pastor.

I believe that there is a lot to be said about the influence of sex in people’s lives today. Music is more sexually oriented, and movies are the same way. However, if it bothers you, perhaps it’s just a better idea to avoid it. My friend refuses to watch R-rated movies. If she can resist the urge, I’m sure others can as well.

After this, Granade explained how many people believe that the church is strictly against sex.

“I’m here to set the record straight…God designed sex to be wonderful, within biblical boundaries,” Granade said.

I think that this does work for many people, and I certainly congratulate them for that. However, some people don’t wait until marriage, and maybe that works just as well.

One of my biggest points of disagreement came when Granade explained that many “don’t allow [themselves] to get connected emotionally… just do [their] wham-bam-thank-you-ma’am.”

I believe that this is a generalization. Some people have completely emotionless sex just for the sake of having sex, but that is not everyone. People I know who have had sex don’t do it without a particular reason. Many are in love with their partners, something that Granade never acknowledged.

Granade came up with many reasons that people have sex before marriage, from cultural influences to the fact that women do not see themselves as beautiful enough, and therefore have to prove themselves by having sex. But he skipped the part that people have sex because they love each other.

Another thing that Granade said that I could not agree with is how women are the cause of all the trouble. I was completely disgusted when he came up with this.

He said that in the Bible, it is always women who start the trouble, and that it is the same today.

He said that the guys should be in charge of “putting the brakes on a relationship.”

Thanks a lot. I’m so glad that we women are getting blamed for everything. So Eve takes a bite of the apple and the women are forevermore known as temptresses? Seems like a very primitive point of view to me.

And, come on – let’s look at this from a realistic point of view. Men are often the ones who try to start something physical in a relationship. Granade said that girls should expect guys to put a stop to sex. Well, I’m afraid that if all girls started expecting that, there would be a lot of disappointed ladies out there.

Those who do not believe in premarital sex, more power to you. It is wonderful that some feel that way today.

But those who feel that their sex life is working out perfectly well outside of marriage are just as entitled to that opinion, and shouldn’t be boxed in by others’ beliefs.

Charlie Granade, pastor of Ridgeview Bible Church has been presenting a three-week sermon series entitled “Solomon on Sex”  to students at Chadron State. Granade gives the sermons at 8:00 p.m. in the Student Center ballroom. The series began Oct. 27 and will conclude Wednesday.