Horror flick brings all the tricks and treats
Ignoring the precedent of in-your-face CGI scare tactics and buckets of fake blood found in many horror films today, “The Conjuring” brings old-fashioned suspense and terror to the big-screen.
Based on a “true story,” this film tells the tale of a down-to-earth family of seven, the Perrons, trying to start anew.
The Perrons get moved into a fix-it farmhouse next to a lake, a prime setting for typical paranormal activity, like doors opening and closing and clocks stopping at obscure, oddly specific times. The fright truly begins when a game of hide-and-clap (it’s like Marco Polo) turns into a game of “Oh hey! We found a really creepy basement full of old and creepy things.” The morning after a night of parental romancing reveals a series of mystery bruises. The younger daughters in the Perron family start seeing and playing with people that aren’t really there. It’s like the word “disaster” is stamped on all seven of their loving, cheery faces. And after several occurrences of “hot damn,” they finally ask for help.
The mother attends a college lecture on exorcisms to find help from Ed and Lorraine Warren, a real-life husband and wife team of demonologists who make house calls, all while carrying some demons of their own.
Without spoiling the movie, a lot more crazy things happened that nearly made me pee in my scaredy-cat pants, like a Satan-worshipping entity taking on the image of a face-eating, zombie mom. Or a creepy music box that was conveniently hidden in a tree for some meandering little girl to find. Luckily, for most of it, I had my fingers forced into my ears and my eyes buried into my knees so hard that I could hardly hear or see anything.
Although, a bit of suspense here and there is an exciting and necessary evil if I ever want to go to the movies and not see a kids’ movie, I have never been big on scary movies. Not to mention demon movies. We go together like dry grass and matches. I like singing, dancing, and cute, fluffy animals that speak with annoying voices. Scary movies, generally, have none of these, and if they do, everything is dead or dying. Despite all the aspects that make me cringe, along with all the clichés, “The Conjuring” really delivered. It had a wonderful mixture of emotional drop-kicks with a feel-good ending. Despite the scares, the movie’s overall message was one about the power of a family sticking together, getting through all of life’s messes, and using each other as support.
All-in-all, I would have enjoyed “The Conjuring” very much, were it not for me being so easily scared out of my wits. Keep in mind it definitely is not the type of movie that you want to watch with your bubbly, flower power girlfriend.
Fans of old-school, suspense-building horror will feel right at home, but anyone looking for blood, guts, and missing limbs will be left with disappointment. If I ever watch it again, it will be in the comfort of my room with all the lights on. And I will definitely be cuddling with my favorite blanket and a stuffed animal or two.