Be careful with the booze

College is fun, isn’t it? There are the crazy parties, the crazy people, and all that fun stuff.

However, it’s not so fun when you encounter that one person who is drunk out of their mind and has no clue what they’re doing, or what is going on around them, plus they like to be a giant pain toward just about everyone they meet.

Unfortunately, this is how I spent my weekend and I’d like to take this opportunity to apologize to anyone that I might have annoyed/hit on/etc. I wasn’t myself, and I’m sure I ended up offending more than a few people. At the same time, I think it’s safe to assume that it was a fun night, right up until I woke up the next day.

I was never big into alcohol when I was in high school. Growing up, both of my parents had told me that nothing good ever came of it.

However, I was still a little curious, so I had the occasional beer with a friend (which is what I advise most of you to stick to rather than the hard stuff), but nothing more than that.

When I graduated, I had decided that when I got to college, I was going to stop being such a little baby about it and be more outgoing.

As a college freshman, I still didn’t do much of that, mostly because I didn’t know anyone in the area. By the time I was in my second semester, some of the guys and I would get together, get smashed, and spend the rest of the night playing Pokemon Stadium.

Now those were fun times, but I wasn’t prepared for the beast that is vodka. I don’t care how much liquor you say you can handle, if you drink this, you are going to wake up dazed and confused the next morning and you will feel like you have taken a sledgehammer repeatedly to the forehead.

There’s nothing more freaky than waking up the next morning not knowing what you did the night before. I can remember little bits and pieces, like annoying the crap out of the front desk workers at High Rise and watching a bunch of people play ping pong. I’m almost certain that I tried to dance, but then there is just a big blank spot in my mind.

I could have done anything and I wouldn’t know about it. I did, however, know about the giant puddle of vomit on my floor. And now, here I am, with a ruined pair of headphones and an iPod that smells like rancid pizza and bad decisions.

I’m not going to say that drinking alcohol is the worst thing that you can do to your body; there are far worse things out there, like meth and fast food.

However, that doesn’t mean that you should go get completely smashed every weekend. Believe me; I had to learn that the hard way.

You should be doing more constructive things, like homework, but then again, who likes homework?

There’s nothing wrong with having a drink once in a while, but when you get to the point where you are blacking out every weekend for about a year, then you might want to reconsider your principles. Try taking up another hobby, like underwater basket weaving, intense late night sessions of video gaming, or Breaking Bad marathons.

Now I’m sure we all had to watch those presentations when we were a kid about alcohol awareness, and I’m going to guess that we all thought the same thing; “Wow, I didn’t know you could do that. I’m going to have to try it now!”

Why public schools show these presentations to young kids I will never know; all it does is let small children know that there is this magical juice that tastes like gas, makes you feel funny, and makes everyone around you look attractive. But at this point in our lives, we should know better…right?

I’m pretty positive we should, but I doubt that is going to stop most bored college students from experimenting with alcohol, let alone other substances.

Ladies and gentlemen, I’m not going to tell you that drinking is the absolute worst, or that every time you drink you are going to have the same kind of experience that I did. However, you should be smart enough to know your limits and be aware of how much you are drinking.

Don’t overdo it, or you will wake up the next morning with not only a hangover, but a few regrets, as well as a ruined sense of dignity. But remember, if you are going to binge anyways, at least remember to bring a bucket.