Adjust your attitude this new year
Happy new semester, year and decade! What a great time to look back at last year and reflect on the good and bad times.
Maybe 2019 wasn’t a good year for most people, but even the best years are speckled with hardships. The struggles you went though (or are still going through) are an added reason to reflect on the good times.
What you dwell on determines your attitude. If you don’t seek out the good things and remember them, it’s easy to only see the pain. Even in the worst year, there are multiple shining moments, but you must make yourself remember them. For me, some positives from 2019 included meaningful conversations I had with people while working at a summer camp, strengthening relationships with friends here in Chadron, and the many opportunities I seized.
None of these were large, significant or expensive, but these little moments are easily dwarfed by any challenges or problems. None of these popped into my mind, unlike all the stressful things. When I look back, those small moments are big to me and they balance out the hard times.
This year, I want to focus more on the joyful times. I want to balance my complaints and worries with gratitude, but how do I do this when my brain’s default mode seems to be complaining?
The answer, as it always seems to be, is building positive habits. You could start a journal, or continue one, and instead of bemoaning the struggles of daily life (at least that’s what tends to fill my journal, if you do differently, props to you), include items of gratitude after your daily rant. One thing that I love to do, but don’t do nearly enough, is write letters of encouragement to the people around me.
Not only does it force me to get outside my own halo of self-pity, but, speaking as one who has received many timely notes, you could end up making that person’s day or week. There is nothing quite so special as receiving an unexpected note from a friend informing you that your hard work is noticed and appreciated.
Even simpler than writing notes or journals, you can influence the conversations of the people around you. When I am finishing a phone call or running out of things to say in a conversation, I like to ask people something that they are looking forward to in the next week or further. Either they have something they are waiting to talk about, or it could be a moment for them to remember something to look forward to, even if it is just being done with their test or project they are struggling with.
For me, this question helps check my attitude, take a step back and see there are exciting things coming, not just looming deadlines. Whatever method you use, remember to highlight the good and unfortunate events in the coming days and weeks.